Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Rationalization
I do not know the difference between rationalization and revelation. Often in the past I have thought that I had a revelation only to later discover that it was a rationalization. For example, one time I thought it was "revealed" to me that I should be a minister or priest. I later had the realization that my revelation was simply a rationalization for my desire to tell others what to believe thereby contriving meaning for my existence.
It also once was revealed to me that I should be great writer or artist. Later, when I was not high, I read my writing and saw my art. I decided to go into business.
The analysis of revelation versus rationalization is too great a philosophical quandry for me. I will leave the matter to great thinkers...and of course the politicians.
Saturday, August 27, 2005
Hills Bank - Downtown Iowa City
This is not the way the downtown branch actually looks. I "doctored" up the photo with Photoshop. I made it look the way I would like things to look. Cool.
Friday, August 26, 2005
This or That
I have dabbled in religion, philosophy and science. They have provided some comfort and are still some of my favorite entertainments. Yet I have not found certainty in them. Many others have found certainty in one or more of the great endeavors of the human intellect. I have not. The fault must be mine. How could I conclude otherwise, when I see so many apparently happy souls espousing various immutable laws and thereoms as the answer to life's happiness. How I long for the certainty of being able to see the world in terms of this or that, good or bad or simply chocolate or vanilla.
O woe is me! I cannot find the comfort of certainty in religion, philosophy and science. I must "endeavor to persevere" as Chief Joseph of the Nez Perce is reported to have said. I must continue trying to act loving and kind simply because doing so enables me to avoid returning to the mental hospital. Boo hoo. Boo hoo. Now where is that candy bar?
Wednesday, August 17, 2005
Saturday, August 13, 2005
Chicago Moon
Uptown Bill's Small Mall
Here is where I work and where my non-profit Just-Dale is headquartered. Uptown Bill's Small Mall - for me it functions as a combination outpatient center and coffee shop. I do a little work every now and then - in between drinking coffee and making amateur art. Someday I will begin doing something earth shattering. I am sure of it. Well, maybe "earth-shattering" is overstating things a bit, "mildly entertaining" is more like it.
Caux Day Ten
I must find out the name of the Mountain at some point. But I am finding that the details do not matter, or perhaps they I am just convincing myself that details are not important because I have difficulty remembering them. No worries.
It is enough for me now to experience the conversations and lectures - and the team WORK! Yesterday I worked for 8 hours in the kitchen. Today I will work another three. Next year I may seek less strenuous conferences!
Since I have time today I will post more pictures.
Thursday, August 11, 2005
Caux Day 7
I dream of a time when our governments are as able to sit and chat as I and my friends did. Oh well. That is much too large an issue for me to get lost in. For now I will just concentrate on keeping contact with the people I have met at Caux.
Monday, August 08, 2005
Caux Day Four
DON'T SWEAT THE DETAILS
I am clear about the purpose of my life – act with love and kindness. I knew this direction at a very early age. How well I practiced it is open to question. At times I feel I was capable of carrying out the task well, at others I doubted my, or anyone else’s ability to do so. No matter. At long last I am certain that the purpose of my life is to treat all things with love and kindness. Simple to say but words cannot convey its true meaning or the difficulty I have in following this simple rule.
Oddly, as this direction has become clearer, I find that my knowledge of precisely HOW I should act with love and kindness has become less clear. At one time I believed it was important to make sure people had the correct view of God and that my role was to explain God’s purpose to them. Later I felt that my duty was to help others to become free of alcohol. Later still I felt that it was my role to marry and have a family. At each of these times I spent much time and effort figuring out the details of how to accomplish the task in front of me only to later find that the details were not important. I knew that acting with love and kindness remained critical in each situation but how I was to do this became less and less clear. In fact, the more I insisted on knowing how to act with love and kindness the less clear things became. Was it loving to “save” my daughter from her crises or was it more loving to remove myself from the situation and let her develop her own solutions? Should I dedicate my life to a particular religion or seek to be loving and kind to all religions? The amount of heat generated in these analyses was inversely proportional to amount of light shed on the subject. I was in quite a pickle.
Now I recognize that I must simply focus on the here and now. This moment, this instant, this pico-second is the only place where love and kindness exist. My past actions may be seen as less than loving and kind in the eyes of others or my own. No matter. That was then and this is now. My future actions may not prove to be loving and kind. No matter. That will be then but this is now. I will smile. I will help with the breakfast preparations. I will take care of my health. I will share love and kindness, now – in this place. I will leave the details of how to act with love and kindness tomorrow with tomorrow.
Saturday, August 06, 2005
Caux Day Three - Pix
More scenes of Montreaux. This morning's talk was enlightening if a bit disenheartening.
Today we discussed Freedom from Want. In our group someone pointed out that although many areas of the world are poor in an absolute sense (ie. no food!) there are many people in affluent societies who feel poor. It seems that even satisfying basic needs does not end the feeling of being "poor". Thus in wealthy societies many people are poor because they always feel they do not have enough or should have more. Perhaps the solution, as one of our group pointed out, is to realize that wealth is wanting what we have and not yearning for what we don't have. If I always want more I will always be poor and uneasy.
It is disenheartening to learn about the true tragedies of poverty. One of our group was from Somalia and shared openly about the death and tragedy that come about when a nation disintegrates. Members of her family have died of starvation while, even at Caux, we waste food. When I think about the amount of effort required to change the minds of wealthy nations and make them willing to enable poorer nations to sustain themselves I can be overwhelmed by depression. To avoid becoming so sad that I am immobile I must focus on what I can change - me.
I believe even more firmly that only by changing me can I bring about change. I cannot give away what I do not have. Hating the wealthy nations is not the solution. Pitying the poorer nations is not the solution for pity soon turns to disgust. Accepting that we are all part of the same planet is crucial. When someone somewhere goes to bed hungry I am allowing a bomb to be planted in my bedroom.
Friday, August 05, 2005
Caux Day Three
Later at the Caux, I saw another example of courage. I listened to someone whose job each day is to reach out to nations in crisis. It must be terribly draining yet she willingly choses to continue. Her talk was very informative. Two points I will follow up on:
- The increasing role of multinational businesses in influencing government policy? Today, it seems that they are so powerful that their reach rivals and exceeds that of most nation states and the UN. How do we show them that it is in their interest to address the issues being explored in this conference?
- I heard that, "Poverty is the biggest Weapon of Mass Destruction." I believe this is a powerful and true idea. Unless we are able to address basic needs then I am not sure how we will survive. Yet, the idea of poverty also exists in the minds of people. People in very affluent societies consider themselves poor in comparison to the richest people in their societies even though they are wealthy when compared to those who lack basic food, clothing and shelter.
Caux Day Two
Initiatives of Change (web: iofc.org) is housed in Mountain House at Caux Switzerland. Check out their website for details. I am attending a conference there and will be posting more. Right now I have to run to a meeting. From the top the above photos are:
- Details from the tower of Mountain House
- Bust of Rev. Buchman, founder of Initiatives of Change (aka Moral Rearmament, aka The Oxford Group).
- Another shot from the balcony of my room.
- Picture of Montreaux which rests at the foot of the mountain where Mountain House perches.
- Picture of Market at Montreaux.
Caux Day One
It was a long trip - 20+ hours from Solon, Iowa to Caux, Switzerland - but it was worth it. The first two shots are from the plane. That is me in the lower left corner of the third shot - trying out my new digital camera. The final shot is from my balcony.
At my first meal I met people from China, India and from Siberia. A promising start I think.